Gym Entry Interview

Gym Entry Interview ~

As I consider going to the gym today, I can’t help but think:  can it really have been six months since I’ve last set my sneakered  shoe in my local Planet Fitness?

Could you imagine if the gym personnel were instructed to conduct an entry interview as you walk thru the door?  Here are some sample questions:  When was your last workout? What was the duration? Cardio? Strength? Both? What is your ETD (Estimated Time of Duration) for today? Is it looking good for tomorrow?  Where do you see yourself in one month? Three months? Six Months? One year? How are you feeling about the red light therapy? Water massage tables? Do you intend to take a tootsie roll on your way out?

To prove that the last six months weren’t completely spent eating, drinking and lounging, you walk in with head held high wearing the perfect mix of spandex and fleece.

Should the entry interview include such direct questions as “Where have you been all this time?” or, more to the point, “Why weren’t you here?”, there are several responses to choose from:  I’ve been in prison, I’ve been on a cruise around the world, I’ve been in a convent, I’ve been curing the black plague, I’ve been in a coma…

Or, more to the point, I’ve been eating, drinking and lounging.


Cardio and Strength. One Hour. Maybe. Five Pounds. All Spandex. And then have to go to the Dentist, too?


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Writing by Marnie Mitchell-Lister

DoubleU = W


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